The Cincinnati Bengals and San Francisco 49ers enter Week 3 coming off tough losses – the Niners failed to hold an early 14-point lead before dropping a 27-24 decision to the Dallas Cowboys in overtime, while the upstart Bengals saw their comeback bid fall short in a 24-22 setback at Denver.

Bengals rookie QB Andy Dalton lit it up for a club rookie-record 332 yards, and got the Bengals to midfield late in the game despite starting the drive on his own five-yard line. But a fourth-down pass to rookie WR A.J. Green was incomplete.

Cincinnati’s smash-mouth style becomes suspect as  the team went 1-for-11 on third-down conversions and failed on both attempts to move the chains on fourth down.

San Francisco could face as many as three of its former players, including Nate Clements and linebacker Manny Lawson. Clements spent the past four seasons with the 49ers, but failed to live up to the eight-year, $80 million deal he signed with the club. Lawson was a first-round pick (22nd overall) by San Francisco in 2006 and signed with the Bengals as a free agent following 15 sacks in 64 games with the Niners, while safety Taylor Mays was drafted by the 49ers in the second round of last year’s draft prior to being traded to Cincinnati before the start of the season. He’s missed the first two games due to a knee injury.

While the Bengals play their first home game of 2011, San Francisco hits the road for the first time after last week’s home collapse. Cincinnati is 5-3 in its home openers under head coach Marvin Lewis and has won 12 of its last 17 at Paul Brown Stadium versus the NFC.

SERIES HISTORY

The 49ers own an 8-3 lead in their overall regular-season series with Cincinnati and won the most recent matchup as well, recording a 20-13 home triumphs back in 2007. The Bengals had defeated San Francisco two straight times prior to that defeat, however, with both of those triumphs taking place on their home turf. Cincinnati outlasted the Niners in a 41-38 shootout at Paul Brown Stadium in 2003, while also coming through with a 44-30 decision at Cinergy Field in 1999. San Francisco is 3-2 all-time as the visitor in this set, though.

The most famous matchups between the franchises came after the 1981 and 1987 seasons, when the 49ers prevailed over the Bengals in Super Bowls XVI (26-21 in Detroit) and XXIII (20-16 in Miami).

WHEN THE 49ERS HAVE THE BALL

San Francisco is still looking to get its offense on track, specifically Gore (106 rushing yards, 6 receptions, 1 TD). Despite scoring on a one-yard run versus the Cowboys for the 49ers’ first points of the game, the former Pro Bowl back was limited to 47 yards on 20 carries and is averaging just 2.5 yards per rush on the season. Smith (303 passing yards, 2 TD, 1 INT) threw for only 179 yards and was picked off once while also getting sacked six times. He was able to complete touchdown passes to wide receiver Kyle Williams and tight end Delanie Walker (3 receptions), however. Williams’ scoring catch was the first of his career, while Walker nabbed his first since Dec. 2, 2007. Smith was without wide receiver Michael Crabtree due to a foot injury and fellow wideout Braylon Edwards (4 receptions) left early with a knee ailment. While Crabtree could return this week, Edwards has already been ruled out with Ted Ginn Jr. expected to take his place in the starting lineup. Kicker David Akers hit a 55-yard field goal, the third longest in club history, is last week’s loss and is one shy of 300 made for his career.

The Bengals will hope to get an edge due to the familiarity of Clements (9 tackles) and Lawson (3 tackles) with San Francisco’s offense, though neither played under Harbaugh or new 49er offensive coordinator Greg Roman. Cincinnati outgained Denver last weekend thanks to a solid defensive effort, though the Bengals’ secondary would like to have back a 52-yard touchdown score it allowed to the Broncos’ Eric Decker early in the fourth quarter. Clements and corner Leon Hall (2 tackles) will try to prevent the big plays this weekend, and Hall recovered one of two forced fumbles versus Denver. Nose tackle Domata Peko (6 tackles) had the other, while end Michael Johnson (8 tackles, 1 sack, 1 INT) and safety Reggie Nelson (13 tackles, 1 sack) both forced the ball loose. Playing without defensive end Robert Geathers due to a shoulder injury, the Bengals came up with two sacks against Denver, while linebacker Thomas Howard (16 tackles) led the club with eight tackles. Geathers could return for this game.

WHEN THE BENGALS HAVE THE BALL

Many expected Cincinnati’s season to get off to a slow start due to the presence of three rookies in the starting lineup on offense, but both Dalton and Green have caught on early in the start of their respective careers. Dalton (413 passing yards, 3 TD, 0 INT) joined Hall of Famer Dan Marino as the only rookies since the 1970 merger to post 100-plus passer ratings in their first two starts. He also showed no ill effects from a wrist injury that caused him to miss the final two quarters of the team’s Week 1 win over Cleveland. Green (11 receptions, 165 yards), meanwhile, leads all rookies in receptions and receiving yards in addition to hauling in a pair of touchdown catches so far. With slot receiver Jordan Shipley out for the season after tearing his ACL last weekend, both Jerome Simpson (8 receptions) and Andre Caldwell (3 receptions) will get more looks from Dalton, as should tight end Jermaine Gresham (8 receptions, 1 TD). Both Green and Simpson went over 100 yards receiving last Sunday. Running back Cedric Benson was held to just 59 yards on 16 carries by the Broncos after going over 100 yards and scoring a touchdown in Week 1.

Benson could struggle again this weekend, as the 49ers have held opponents to just 54.5 rushing yards per game over the first two weeks. That gives them the top-ranked run defense in the early going, but the club ranks 25th against the pass (291.0 ypg). In fact, Dallas’ game-winning field goal was set up on a 77- yard reception by Jesse Holley. Linebackers Patrick Willis (13 tackles) and NaVorro Bowman (16 tackles) combined for 19 tackles versus Dallas, while cornerback Tramaine Brock (5 tackles) notched his second interception in as many weeks. Safety Donte Whitner (9 tackles) added his first interception with the Niners and sixth of his career in the loss, as well as the former Bill’s first since Dec. 5 of last year. Defensive end Ray McDonald (7 tackles, 2 sacks) came away with San Francisco’s lone sack against Dallas. The Niners’ defense features a pair of former Bengals in defensive tackle Justin Smith (6 tackles, 2 sacks) and safety Madieu Williams. Smith was the fourth overall pick of the 2001 draft by Cincinnati and played his first seven seasons there.

KEYS TO THE GAME

Dalton will need to keep the Niners’ defense on the field, which may not be the easiest of tasks. San Francisco leads the NFL with 10 three-and-outs forced on the year and hasn’t allowed a 100-yard rusher in 24 straight games. That is the longest such streak in the NFL. Win the turnover battle. San Francisco holds a plus-4 turnover differential, while the Bengals are a plus-3 and haven’t committed a giveaway yet this season. Cincinnati has had to rally twice in its first two weeks, so a quick start will keep the home crowd in the game throughout and enhance its chances of winning.

OVERALL ANALYSIS

The 49ers offense is putting up numbers similar to what was expected out of the Dalton-led Bengals, who are looking to continue their better-than-expected start this weekend. Dalton has shown great poise through his first six NFL quarters, so the likes of Willis, Bowman and Justin Smith will look to rattle the rookie early. Cincinnati’s defense struggled against the run a week ago, meaning this should be the week that Gore gets going. It still might not be enough, as a trip across the country isn’t likely to end San Francisco’s recent road struggles.

Oddbounces prediction: Bengals 16, 49ers 10.

Bengals rookie WR A.J. Green grabs game-winning reception.

Now Showing – Switched At Kickoff.

Could swear yesterday was one of those painfully repeated body-switching story lines with the dad becoming the son, and son the dad. Oh no, dad’s off to junior high school as the son for band pratice, and junior’s performing brain surgery as the dad.  

I mean, was it the Cincinnati Bengals versus the Cleveland Browns, or the Cleveland Browns against the Cincinnati Bengals?

In a stunning reversal of roles made possible only in a Hollywood movie, THE  Browns came out with mindless, stupid penalty after mindless, stupid pentalty - not THE  Bengals. And it was Cleveland’s defense caught napping in the huddle – not Cincinnati.

Before we knew it, the handsome, gentlemanly sailor got the girl, and Bengals’ backup quarterback Bruce Gradkowski had thrown a 41-yard touchdown pass to rookie WR A.J. Green, rallying the Bengals to an unlikely, and improbable, 27-17 fourth-quarter win over the sloppy, last-place Browns.

Movie star Gradkowski noticed the Browns were still in a defensive huddle, leaving Green wide open and DB Joe Haden racing to catch up. Fortunately for the Bengals, Green had a 15-yard head start and scored easily on the 41 yard touchdown throw to give Cincinnati a 20-17 lead with 4:28 to play.

Bengals second-year TE Jermaine Gresham pulls in QB Andy Dalton's first NFL TD pass.

Cleveland’s rookie head coach Pat Shurmur feels his defense was not given sufficient time to substitute and line up on the play. However the officials didn’t think twice about not throwing a flag or stopping play. Bottom line – on this day it was the Browns caught with their panties down.

No doubt Bengals fans were caught off guard by the team’s quick start – not typical, especially with so many rookies on offense. Having deferred after winning the coin toss, the Bengals D came out blazing, holding the Browns to one yard on their first drive. When the Bengals’ offense came on the field, they used Benson and short passes from Dalton to move 35 yards in 10 plays and struck first with a Mike Nugent field goal.

The Bengals defense looked great again in the second drive, forcing the Browns into another three-and-out. Once the Bengals got the ball back, they marched 41 yards down the field and rookie quarterback Andy Dalton threw his first career touchdown pass hitting Jermaine Gresham in the end zone. The defense forced another three-and-out and again, the offense scored on another Nugent field goal.

Then things changed.

The hapless Browns rallied in the second quarter with a pair of touchdowns from Colt McCoy and eventually led 17-13 in the third quarter before the football gods began shining on the Bengals. The cake’s icing came a few minutes after Green’s touchdown reception when Bengals’ RB Cedric Benson blasted 39 yards untouched for a touchdown putting the game away with 1:49 left.

The upstart Bengals turned to their D to stop the Browns passing attack. Bengals DE, Carlos Dunlap, harassed McCoy on their final possession, forcing the Browns to punt with just over 2:00 remaining in the game. Needing a stop for any hope of a comeback on 3rd & 4 with less than 2:00 in the game, the Browns D failed. Bengals RB, Cedric Benson, scampered 39-yards off the right side of the o-line to pay dirt, providing the final score of 27-17 over the Browns.

Prior to injuring his wrist, Bengals rookie QB, Andy Dalton, was 10-15 81 yards 1 TD. Gradkowski finished the game 5/12 92 yards 1 TD in relief of Dalton.

Bengals' Rookie QB Andy Dalton - make it seem like he's hardly even there.

Every George Clooney movie. Shopping with your wife. And NFL rookie quarterbacks. They all rank high on “this will surely suck” lists – and throw in rabie shots and visiting in-laws, for good measure.

The goal with every rookie NL quarterback is hide him … hide him like a fever blister on prom night. That’s precisely what the Cincinnati Bengals must do with first-year signal-caller Andy Dalton, who’s preparing to make his NFL debut Sunday at Cleveland (1 pm).

Head coach Marvin Lewis and the Bengals’ coaching staff must make it seem like Dalton’s hardly even there – because far more than Dalton performing great, the Bengals need him to not be terrible.

I mean, how many QBs the past half century have had dominating rookie seasons? By my count, two. Dan Marino (’83) and our own Greg Cook (’69). No, not Joe Flacco and Matt Ryan. And certainly not Ben Roethlisberger, who got paid for simply riding The Bus. Those QBs and precious few others had serviceable rookie seasons in which they didn’t lose games, which is all Dalton needs to do. DON’T LOSE GAMES.

There are five who are critical to Dalton’s Not Be Terrible campaign.

1. Dalton, himself. Rookie QBs are they’re own worst enemies with stupid mistakes, misreads and the general misery born of inexperience. First order, avoid temptations to be TCU Dalton, which leads to more general misery born of inexperience. Second, follow game plans – no freelancing for NFL Network highlights. Play wise beyond your years, AD.

2. Jay Gruden. A rookie himself, Gruden must instill a fake it til you make it mentally in his baby-chick QB. It’s a mamouth task teaching rookie QBs that punting isn’t all bad, because like dogs chasing cars, rookies can’t stop themselves – making a really bad throw can look just like shiny, new rims on a moving Buick.    

Bengals' rookie WR A.J. Green - 1 of 5 musts for Andy Dalton and team success.

3. Andrew Whitworth. Obviously the whole OL is critical, but especially Whit. If Dalton gets gun shy from countless blindsiders, not only is the season sunk but possibly his career. Bad left tackle play has ruined many a rookie QB.

4. Cedric Benson/Bernard Scott. No run game means Dalton has to be TCU Dalton – and that’s DOA. If Dalton faces 3rd and 9 all season it could be 0-16. Benson needs to go for about 1,500 yards (12 – 14 TDs), and Scott between 700 – 900 (6 TDs).

5. A.J. Green. Cincinnati has lacked a deep threat since 2005 (Chris Henry, and a little, little bit of Chad). Green’s gotta be the real deal, and has to demonstrate an ability to get deep once in a while, as well as compliment Jermaine Gresham and Jordan Shipley. Like Dalton, Green must play wiser and better (1,000 -1,200 yards, 8 – 10 TDs) than his years.

If Dalton tries (or has) to make a name for himself this season, bad things will come. The less we know and hear about Dalton, the better for the Bengals.

In a different time and place, tonight’s Bengals v. Colts would be just another who-cares game; one for which season ticket holders love to complain about having to dish out serious money. Not so ‘who cares’, though, when your two biggest offensive weapons have yet to record their first official NFL pass and catch.

I have no idea what to expect tonight (my inside sources go as far as Pete Rose Way). Do you know? Will rookie QB Andy Dalton and WR A. J. Green play one drive? One quarter? Two? Three? My question, why not the whole game? The New Bengals can’t afford to see this as a throw-away season; accepting 3-13 because you have the rookie QB excuse won’t cut it with fans.

Make no mistake, this is not the same kind of team Carson Palmer inherited in 2004, in which two years previous they’d posted a 2-14 record. Remember, two years ago this team was 11-5, had barnstormed the division at 6-0 en route to the playoffs. Many of the same players are here – so this is not a prototypical rebuilding year. There are some expectations, rookie QB or not.

Bengals rookie WR phenom A. J. Green has just seven preseason catches. Fifty-six players have more than him. Has he been properly brought along this preseason?

Look, you can’t convince me that five weeks ago this coaching staff didn’t already know their QB situation. They knew 100% Dalton was their starter. They knew 100% Bruce Gradkowski was the no. 2. And they knew 100% Baby Palmer was not to be.

So why not give Dalton a full preseason of snaps? Get him ready to throw it.

Dalton has thrown just 51 passes in three games (completed 31 for a 58.8%). By contrast, veteran Atlanta Falcons QB Matt Ryan, entering his fourth season, has thrown 67 passes. Seem cockeyed?

I felt going into the preseason Dalton needed to throw 80 - 10o balls. Why? Because how Dalton throws, not hands off, this year determines the Bengals’ season.

Yes, I know opponents’ defenses aren’t scheming and game-planning …  and yes, I know preseason defenses are worlds apart from regular-season Ds. That’s not the point. Dalton needs reps for timing with the WRs, and for general comfortability with the system and his receivers.

Because trust me, fans won’t be comfortable with 3-13 in ’11.

The Cincinnati Bengals announced today the signing of left tackle Andrew Whitworth, who received a two-year extension that keeps him in Cincinnati through the 2015 season. Whitworth becomes the first Bengals player to get a contract extension since the NFL lockout ended. He was a second-round draft pick in ’06. This is good news for Bengals fans, due to Whitworth’s leadership role on and off the field. After the Carson Palmer tragedy, the team could not afford to lose another leader.

2011 represents a Red Dawn for the team once dominated by me-me's and I-I's.

Okay, I admit it. No, make that, I proclaim it.

Two or three eye blinks after the Bengals final game of 2010, I was done. DONE. I’d contracted painful and debilitating Mike Brown Disease and it had spread from the pit of my stomach to the outterskirts of my entire being. I had it bad.

I was sick of Brown, and the whole idea of watching, hearing about or god forbid actually writing on his team ever again was nauseating. Any team with Mike Brown or the two cancer-causing WRs was no team of mine.  And the whole Carson Palmer fiasco soon after made matters worse. I was a beaten man. But time heals all wounds – even Mike Brown.

For the record I’m not predicting a successful 2011 season, at least measured by wins, playoff games and Super Bowl trophies (although I’m not ruling out a “decent” season, possibly even nursing a playoff run deep into the season).

While this team will struggle with a rookie QB who’s had the prep time of a sneeze attack, and their best WR has yet to catch his first NFL pass, there are bright spots aplenty. Canceling the terminal TOcho Show and a few other bad seeds from last year’s mess was the requisite blood-letting the team needed, and by all accounts, The New Bengals are a better team. Yes, a better team.

Even with a rookie QB … no, make that BECAUSE of a rookie QB, The New Bengals are born. Is Andy Dalton a better skilled signal-caller than retired Carson Palmer? Probably not. But does Dalton give them a better change to win in ’11? Hmmm. Possibly? Look, by the end of last season Palmer was so TO’d out, Ocho’d out and Mike Brown’d out that he too was done … a beaten man. Like I was.

But over time (lotsa time) I found my way back, because I’d grown up with the Bengals (and Palmer didn’t). But I’m also on the Andy Dalton Bandwagon. The kid is good.

It’s said you can’t cure stupid. Not true. The New Bengals have proved that wrong by shipping out TO and Ocho, making The New Bengals a possibility. I mean, c’mon, don’t you feel better about this team without The Weekly Clown Show? Be honest.

Isn’t the The New Bengals team IQ and likebility factor on the up?

Now all we need are Ws.

It’s good to be back.

Detective John First (Bruce Willis) and Sweets Fi’Teen (Marvin Lewis) together again as First & Fi’Teen. Willis, the sassy-ass cop with an iron jaw and hair trigger. Lewis, the wise-cracking, back-alley coach with a sleeping disorder. In this action-thriller punks don’t get no delay of game … cause the ass-kicking IS ALWAYS ON! Co-starring Danny Glover, and Denise Richardson as Little LillyLou Lane.

Be honest. Everytime the “little yellow flag” indicator lights up on your TV’s mini scoreboard you know it’s against the Bengals, right? No, make that, you KNOW it’s against the Bengals, right? We all know it’s against the Bengals.

To some teams first and fifteen happens occasionally, but the Cincinnati Football Bengals live by it. It’s how they roll.  

Under Marvin Lewis the Bengals have always suffered from chronic self-destruction, and Sunday’s 24-21 final-minute meltdown versus the Tampa Bay Bucs is a re-release of the hit B-movie First ‘n Fi’teen, starring Marvin Lewis. But this version has a twist.

This movie is about Third ‘n Thr’teen.

But before that now infamous Third ‘n Thr’teen pass with 2:28 left, there was a whole lotta self-destruction going on. More endlessly unacceptable penalties. More malignant pass droppings. More absent pass protection. More inexplicable play calling. Lots of More. More. And More.

And no, this is not Palmer’s loss.

I’ve re-watched the game three times (via Short Cuts) – of his 36 passes, six were either outright dropped or bobbled going out of bounds (TB had no drops). Palmer’s first INT was a bad play on his part, but the Bucs’ LB made a great play on the ball. On the second INT, probably eight times out of  10 T.O. wrestles that ball from the DB. The third INT hit Chad in the hands. Of Palmer’s 36 passes, only five were uncatchable, three of which were intentionally dumped due to good coverage.

But this movie was mostly about Third ‘n Thr’teen.

My first reaction to the third-and-13 pass from Palmer to T.O. (2:28 left, Bengals up 21-14, TB with no timeouts) was  … WTF! And I went to bed with WTF! on the brain.

But then Monday I read Lewis’ comments, which I usually take with a grain of salt and a fifth of whiskey. Lewis was taking the blame – but said they wanted to be “aggressive” in that situation. You know what? I’m okay with that. Yeah, sure in hindsight I wish they would have punted, but I can’t fault being aggressive – trying to win a game.

Tampa Bay Bucs' rookie WR Mike Williams wrestles ball from Bengals' CB Johnathon Joseph for a game-tying TD.

And yeeks! … for the first time in eight years I actually agree with OC Bob Bratkowski:

“We knew if we got a first down, the game was over,” Bratkowski said. “So that’s the decision that was made. In those critical situations, I always get Marvin’s take. I’m not trying to blame him. We always discuss those things. Just so that I know his thinking at the time. The thinking was if we complete that ball, the game’s over.”

Look, this loss wasn’t Bratkowski’s, or Lewis’, or Palmer’s, or the WR’s, or the defense’s fault. It was a big-time, all-around team loss – which is what’s plagued the Bengals since the last few games of ’09. They look like world beaters one drive, and EggBeaters the next. They look like studs on one series, and vaginas the next.

Simply, after five games they’ve yet to record a true team-wide win – either one phase of the game or another seems to save the day. 

So where do we go from here?

We’re looking at 2-3 and an unforgiving schedule. Well, it all comes down to Lewis and Palmer. Let’s see what these guys are made of.

Can Lewis finally be the head coach I claim he’s never been? Can Palmer lead this offense out of The Crud? Because, hey, running backs can’t do it … left tackles can’t do it … nor can linebackers or place kickers. What’s ailing the Cincinnati Football Bengals can only be righted by a head coach and his QB.

So, how does this movie end?

Bengals WR Terrell Owens grabs 10 ball for 222 yards and a TD in 23-20 loss to Browns.

From O.T. to T.O., the forward pass has gone from scratching in the dirt to complex plays rivaling Space Shuttle blueprints.

And watching Bengals QB Carson Palmer and WR Terrell Owens on Sunday do their ‘Throw & Catch’ show had me pondering that balmy day in 1876 when Yale’s Walter Camp tossed that first-ever forward pass to Oliver “O.T.” Thompson.

After which Thompson befuddled fans by donning a H.O.F. 20?? blazer.

Just as that Camp-to-Thompson pass must have had opposing defensive coordinators scratching their heads, I’m guessing the Palmer-to-Owens Show will do the same to Tampa Bay’s defensive brain trust, as well as league-wide DCs.

Why? Well, if the Palmer-to-Owens Show is for real, it’s the first time in years opposing DCs have to account for a deep receiver other than Ocho. For the first time in years opposing DCs can’t just double-team H.O.F. 20?? without consequences. For the first time in years opposing DCs actually have to game plan for the Bengals passing game.

For the first time in years opposing DCs have to take the Bengals WR corp seriously.

No doubt Sunday T.O. went all 2005 on the Browns – he was Slim+Housh rolled into one . Owens got deep like Slim, but went over the middle like Housh. He played tall, pulling down the high pass like Slim, but muscled the ball away from CBs like Housh.

So if the The Palmer-to-Owens Show is for real, it certainly gives the offense some of that ’05 punch. But a bigger test comes Sunday versus Tampa Bay, who even during down years can still play defense – the Bucs currently rank fifth in the NFL against the pass.

If we’re looking for silver linings from Chicken-Shit Hit Bowl II, I say: 1) the cheap shot on Jordan Shipley may have woken up this team, and 2) The Palmer-to-Owens Show could provide the sorely missed ’05 punch.

Chicken-Shit Hit Bowl I - 1980 - Browns Thom Darden head-spears defenseless Bengals receiver Pat McInally.

Before the Internet. Before Twitter. Before iPod. Before even, um, loud-mouth sports bloggers there was Browns safety Thom Darden and Bengals receiver Pat McInally.

Thirty years ago this season – Dec. 21, 1980 – Darden took advantage of a stretched-out, defenseless McInally. Seconds later McInally would lay stretched out, unconscious. Minutes later he would lay stretched out, on a stretcher.

And like that game 30 years ago, won by Cleveland 27- 24, the Browns yesterday eked out a three-point win, 23-20, in Chicken-Shit Hit Bowl II.

Hey, I’m not in favor of further feminizing the game of professional football. Just the opposite. But somehow over the past 20 – 30 years cheap shot artists like Hines Ward, Thom Darden and now the Browns’ TJ Ward‘s Mother of All Cowardly Hits on Bengals receiver Jordan Shipley somehow result in big reputations as ‘bringers of the wood’ … studs … and hard hitters. I say they’re hardly hitters, because anyone can shot fish in a barrell.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tfJybuzkMT0

Real hits happen when two dudes face (and see) each other. Don’t believe me? YouTube some of Earl Campbell‘s eye-to-eye, battering-ram blows on LBs/DBs. Google Bo Jackson‘s bulldozing over a face-t0-face Brian Bosworth. Those are Man Hits – not the Chicken-Shit, The-Guy’s-Not-Looking jobs we see today.

Oh, by the way, McInally returned in Chicken-Shit Hit Bowl I to make an incredible over-the-shoulder TD catch, while the Browns two weeks later lost in the playoffs to the Oakland Raiders as a result of the stupidest last-minute interception in football history (thank you Brian Sipe). And the Bengals? Well, they went on to the Super Bowl the following year.

A little Charma? Yeah, maybe, if you believe in that stuff. Let’s hope Chicken-Shit Hit Bowl II at least wakes up this team, and fast.