Selling Tupperware, Wearing Speedos And Defending Bengals QB Carson Palmer.

16 Submitted by on Fri, 01 October 2010, 06:26

Of Palmer: “He looks like he’s lacking confidence back there in the pocket," says Esiason.

Yes, Boomer Esiason can bring it. Like him or not, the former Cincinnati Bengals signal caller has never double-pumped or taken a knee on speaking his mind. 

So it’s hardly shocking he’s weighing in on PalmerGate.

Oddbounces free college intern Jimmy Jyms has learned Esiason soundly rejected offers from TV’s Oprah and The View – instead choosing to speak about Palmer with Bengalton, D.C.’s Geoff Hobson of

As Bengals fanaticals, we’re just trying to figure out what’s wrong with the Bengals offense, the passing game and Palmer, right? Palmer’s detractors point to everything from “he’s just lost it” to “his arm is gone” to “he makes bad decisions.” On the surface, I see their points.

But nothing here makes sense, and never did. I keep reading that Palmer’s lost arm strength, but I don’t see it, and never did. So I question whether the “experts” are actually watching all the tape, or only a few game highlights from NFL Channel. Because from my vantage point (granted, the cheap seats), he ain’t lost velocity (one example – the misfire to Ocho in the back of the endzone versus Baltimore. That was a 30-yard, 90-MPH fastball. And he’s almost put a hole through Shipley with a few throws).

Former NFL all-pro QB turned CBS-TV analyst Rich Gannon said he broke down all 122 Palmer passes this season.

"They stack conveniently on your shelves, ladies ... and what's up with Carson Palmer? Where's the velocity?"

“I’ve looked at his mechanics and I don’t see a lot of change. He’s still throwing the ball with velocity,” Gannon said. “I don’t see any indications of the things you see with bad mechanics. He’s not looking at the rush. He’s not bailing out. He’s not shortening his stride. His lower body looks to be fine. I don’t see a guy laboring to get the ball out there.”

I’ve made those same Palmer observations. So what is wrong, Boomer?

“That’s not the Carson Palmer I know,” said Esiason, who sees nothing physically wrong with Palmer. “He looks like he’s lacking confidence back there in the pocket. I don’t know if it’s the new receivers, or the protection, or what. I had my Dave Shula sightings. I had my Reggie Rembert sightings. I had young coaches. And I’m not saying these are any of his problems. I’m just saying every quarterback goes through losing confidence, for whatever reason.”

Ah, lost confidence. Now you’re talking.

So, why does a former all-pro QB who age-wise is in the prime of his career suddenly lose confidence? Does he just wake up one day and for no reason it’s gone? Or could it be from 2005 to 2009 he slowly went from having arguably the best offensive line to one of (if not the) worst? … from having one of the best receiving corps to one of the league’s worst? … from having two of the game’s best deep threats to no deep threats? … from playing in a strong pass-oriented offense to a 2001 Baltimore Ravens run-first type offense? I could go on and on.

Look, guys like me don’t just sell Tupperware on the side, wear speedos and defend Carson Palmer for the fun of it – we got a purpose. And that’s what I hope to see from the Bengals’ offense Sunday in Cleveland. Keep chipping away at the issues facing this team, this offense  – and no better way than by keeping alive the Browns’ hope for a perfect 0-16 season.

And hey, if you’re looking to host a Tupperware Party let me know!

Written by

16 Responses to "Selling Tupperware, Wearing Speedos And Defending Bengals QB Carson Palmer."
  1. NuffJohnson says:

    Tupper ware and Carson apologist: In both cases, it’s nothing without the “burp”.

  2. Timzilla says:

    Go back and read my stuff. C’mon, do I seem like the kinda guy to aplogize for anybody? Plus, Palmer doesn’t return my phone calls, has a restraining order out on me, and sics his two pitbulls on me each time I jump his fence – so I got no love for the lowly bastard. Trust me, the moment I think the O woes are his fault, I’ll go all ‘Zilla on his ass.

  3. Houdino says:

    The battle begins anew…
    1. Yes, Palmer threw a bullet to Ocho from about 25-30 yards out (and he was closer to hitting the goal posts than Chad). Yes, he throws bullets to Shipley…from 10-15 yards away. He also couldn’t get the ball into the endzone in NE on the last play of the half. I think at least half the QBs in the league get it there. I’m more concerned about his arm strength on deep routes than short to medium routes.
    2. Rich Gannon doesn’t get the best games for a reason. More analysts and former QBs have gone on record to say Carson’s mechanics are off…he’s short-arming the ball, moving his feet incorrectly in the pocket, and more. I’ll take their insights over Gannon’s.
    3. Despite his disadvantages (and he has them), I believe a great QB talent should be able to get it done at a higher level than Carson has, especially against two mediocre secondaries (NE and Carolina). Aaron Rogers, Jay Cutler and even Michael “Dog Killer” Vick are, so far, top 5 QBs with horrible O-lines. Rogers gets hit, sacked and run out of the pocket at league-high rates. Cutler has a bad o-line with avg receivers in a brand new, complex system. And Vick? Hell, his terrible O-line is the least of his disadvantages. He’s barely played in 4 years!

  4. Timzilla says:

    1) I saw that play many time – it actually wasn’t all that easy of a completion. Point being, tho, his arm appears fine … 2) I haven’t heard a QB yet claim his mechanics are off (Warren Sapps don’t count) … 3) Different QBs and QB situations are apples to orange. So let’s see how the offense, the passsing game and Palmer do thru the Tampa Bay game – I think we’ll learn a lot about this whole team by then.

  5. 2Coy2bBacon says:

    We cant just look at one or two players. The whole offense has played bad. It sucks when the two best offensive players are two rookies, but none of the big plays are designed to go to them. The bengals haven’t stretched the field since Henry left.

  6. Houdino says:

    Zilla, I just like arguing with you about Carson. In reality, I also think Carson and the O-line get better throughout the course of the season. But if he/they aren’t in form by mid-season, that’s when you’ll really hear me yappin’.
    And 2Coy, unfortunately, our best offensive players are two rookies AND a kicker. That just can’t be good.
    More love for Huber too. He was amazing last week.

  7. NuffJohnson says:

    Whether it’s something pysical or not, I still want an explanation for why a QB who should be in his physical/mental prime, is making poor decisions now that he DID not make as a rookie. Blame the OL, blame the WR’s or blame the OC for whatever you want– when a QB is in the pocket with ball in hand (assuming he’s still upright), he ALONE makes numerous microsecond decisions to determine
    A) WHEN
    B) WHERE
    C) TO WHOM, and perhaps most importantly
    D) IF he throws the ball

    Assuming he’s still standing, no one else can do that for him– it’s he and the ball. why so many of his decisions seem ill-advised is my biggest concern.

  8. CarsonCityQB says:

    The good news is all the key Bengals skilled players have performed at a very high level in the past (Carson, Benson, Ocho, TO). It’s obvious that Shipley and Gresham are for real. Yes I’m a little worried about the offense but not freaking out.

  9. Timzilla says:

    H’dino, ah, so you just like arguing with me, huh? Well you obviously didn’t read your Oddbounces Employee Handbook, page 234 clearly states “no just liking to argue with Timzilla permitted.” Sorry, clear out your locker … I hear Bengals blog has a job opening.

    CCQB – yup, if team MVPs were doled out today I’d say the 2 rookies would be right in there, the two CBs and Brandon Johnson.

  10. Timzilla says:

    NuffJo – I agree some of those bad decisions were bad decisions, and some were actually good decisions with bad throws. A lot of the apparent bad throws were complete-able had they been throw to a better location (inside shoulder vs. outside shoulder stuff). Because the QB is the most visible player on the field, he’s who we most see screwing up … but I content while Palmer is screwing up, so too are probably 6 or 7 other Bengals offensive players. To me the whole offense just looks outta whack.

  11. CarsonCityQB says:

    Palmer showed what he can do on Sunday. Him and TO are developing some timing. The OL sucks. The DL sucks. Wallace had all day to throw and Palmer typically had about 1 second. Nobody predicted the Browns running over the Bengals D like that. Not me.

  12. 2Coy2bBacon says:

    Palmer looked great yesterday but a lot of good it did us. I agree with CarsonCity that the lines look awful. As usual Palmer had no time to throw it and Benson had no where to run it. Unless something dramatic happens on the lines the Bengals will struggle to have a winning season.

  13. Timzilla says:


    Yes I agree … unless something happens with the OL, the Bengals will struggle mightly against the best of the best. I say this is among the worst OLs in team history. Whitworth would be great at guard, but NOT a LT. Roland can run forward okay, but can’t manuever backwards into pass protection. Cook is almost avergae on everything other pass play. Williams is the only semi-consistent lineman they have.

    CCQB, yes Palmer and TO appeared in sync yesterday. I’ve felt all along that in the long run, TO would be Palmer’s go-to guy … not Ocho.

  14. dallasorbust says:

    The offense has to light up Tampa Bay for about 400 in the air, just to show the passing game is for real.

  15. Timzilla says:

    Dallas, what Palmer+TO did Sunday was huge for a lot of reasons. That was the first time since probably ’05 or ’06 that someone other than Chad was consistently getting open deep, like Slim used to, which changes everything for an offense. Now that Sunday’s game is on film, teams have to game plan against it … which means Chad won’t be getting double-teamed anymore this year.

  16. FanCPants says:

    Hey Nuff. “It’s him and the ball” … maybe it’s the ball.

leave a comment

Warning: Unknown: open(/home/content/70/5957770/tmp/sess_q3vsa76pu03ptga5afs3q8ca03, O_RDWR) failed: No such file or directory (2) in Unknown on line 0

Warning: Unknown: Failed to write session data (files). Please verify that the current setting of session.save_path is correct () in Unknown on line 0