By Nuff Johnson
Even "The Man Of Steel" couldn't save Obama's health care plan.
In the wake of the political kryptonite exploding on Massachusettes’ election Tuesday, President Barrack Obama is doing an end-run faster than a speeding bullet.
Realizing his lofty health care reform plan is on life support, Obama has abruptly shifted focus towards another American icon: NFL football.
Apparently tinkering with banks, automobile manufacturers, the nation’s monetary policy and health care has left the President with idle time.
To fill it, Obama announced he is adding a new role to his resumé: NFL Point Czar.
“As an underprivileged youth growing up on the streets of Kenya, I was deprived of the opportunity to closely follow the NFL,” Obama said.
“But I have always been a passionate fan of the NFL … and I see a disturbing trend: teams with superior talent, drive and preparation frequently outscore those teams that are less talented, less intense and are less prepared. It’s another example of the privileged taking advantage of the underprivileged.”
"I woulda made a fine NFL Point Czar" is what an envious Jimmy the Greek woulda said.
Obama went on to say: “This kind of class division is not the America that I know or want. And it’s not the kind of America most Americans know and want. So as your President it’s my duty to right this wrong, and I start by appointing myself NFL Point Czar.”
Although details are unclear, it seems Obama wants to bring parity where it matters most; the game scoreboard. At the two-minute warning of each half, the team with the lead must give a portion of its points to their less-successful opponent.
Other options being discussed include handicapping those on the playing field to make it more level, such as forcing Troy Palamalu to play barefoot, Brett Favre donning a patch over one eye, and Payton Manning forced to wear clown-like, over-sized shoulder pads.
Oddbounces reporters wondered aloud how Obama’s end game might affect the Cincinnati Bengals. Perhaps Mike Brown will be required to read a job description of an NFL General Manager? Maybe Shayne Graham will be given up to three “do-overs” on field goal attempts in ’10.
Nuff said.
One picture: one thousand words, minimum.
